Nicole DeLeo

Day 2

LING

I loved the format of your project! The graphics were really good! Your photography skills are great. The only downfall of the project that I'd like you to critique, is that the text related to the pictures I feel do not capture the audience. Not only do you need the pictures/graphics to captures the audience you also need the text. The pictures should tell the story you want to present the text should make that story personal. Ask questions, pretend you are walking down a dirt road with the audience and ask them questions about themselves and pretend you are reminiscing with them, not to them.

John

I like your strategy of where you are going with the Home project. Your into movie making and I love how you related that and made in a theme to your Home project. The first picture of your family is really good, and we get a clear concept of what your home/family life is like. Though the picture is a very candid shot, the picture neglects the audience... the pictures represents the story you are aiming to tell but the text should be really inviting to the audience then. Your family also has a cliche aspect to it, but in order for us to be interested in what you want to present we need some individuality in your family, because every family is different. Since there is some comedy in your project, maybe you can bring out a humorous side of your family while inviting the audience to the comedy.

Nicole T

You did a great job generating the concept of home. I love the way you presented a history with Mr. Bear. Nicole obviously sees so much life in Mr. Bear and the picture represents the life she sees in him, cuddled up in her bed like a human, also the drives the point home with her text. Her memory with Mr. Bear represents her love and devotion to the Bear and it drives the audience to really see that. In all of her text I'd like to see more of a personal relationship with her audience and herself.